Dear Corey

Dear Ex-Fiance,

I've had a lot on my mind lately--a lot of stuff about you and what happened between us and how much my mental illness issues contributed to it.

Then tonight I was reading old emails between you and I and old journal entries of mine that had to do with the mental stuff and you.

And I want you to know that I am sorry.  I am so, so, so sorry for everything I put you through.

Because as my head's gotten a little clearer and I've gotten space and time I've started to see how awful I was at points.  And I'm so sorry for that.  From the bottom of my heart.  I put you through a lot that you didn't deserve and I am sorry.

I don't want you to know that in the hopes that you'll want me back or anything like that.  I want you to know that because it's a genuine, sincere feeling.  I think you're wonderful, and I'm sorry for hurting you.

I truly hope, with everything I have, that someday you will be able to look at me and not see those things.  I hope that someday you'll see a woman who has fought a battle and won, a woman you can love and have a future with.

I want you to know that even when I was at my worst, I loved you.  That was never in question, not for one second of our relationship.

Love,
Jessica